A Very Merry Tweekmas
by PrincessPenelliotTheBrave
Summary: Craig has had many crushes, but Tweek and Thomas are different. It's not that he isn't confident enough to ask one of them out, it's just that he can't decide which one he should ask.
1. Chapter 1

"Craig honey, breakfast is ready!" Craig's mom called up to him from the kitchen.

"Coming!" He called back, grabbing his hat. He put it on and looked at himself in the mirror.

"Nice." He commented to himself before exiting his bedroom.

When he got to the kitchen his sister was already seated at the table eating pancakes and scrambled eggs with their dad.

"Here's your plate Craig." His mom handed him some pancakes of his own. "Be careful, it's hot."

"Okay mom, thank you." He said in a monotone as always.

Craig sat next to his dad and took out his phone. He had a couple texts from Clyde.

 **"Hey man, look at the pictures I got of Tweek on the diving board yesterday. He was too scared to jump off, look at his face."**

Attached were a couple images of Tweek at the public pool with Token and Jimmy. Craig couldn't be there because he was in detention again.

Craig zoomed in on Tweek's face while mindlessly picking at his pancakes. He had never told anyone, but Craig found Tweek incredibly cute when he was anxious or scared.

Against his will, Craig's eyes drifted down to Tweek's bare chest, admiring his slim figure as he popped a slice of pancake in his mouth.

"What are you looking at?" His dad suddenly asked staring at Craig's phone.

"Nothing." Craig said, turning it off.

"Don't 'nothing' me, what was that?" He said, raising his eyebrows at his son.

"Just something Clyde sent me."

"Clyde, huh? You two gay now or something?" His dad muttered into his coffee.

"Thomas, stop bothering him. He can be gay if he wants to!" Laura scolded her husband.

"Yeah, I can be gay if I want. Wait, what?" Craig paused.

"You will not be gay!" Thomas thundered.

"I'm not gay. It was just a picture of my friend, dad."

His dad snorted and resume drinking his coffee in silence.

Craig finished his pancakes quickly, heading to the door for his coat. His phone buzzed, alerting him to another text from Clyde.

 **"Dude, did you get my text?"**

"Yeah. Tweek is such a baby LOL." Craig typed back.

"Bye Mom. Bye Dad." He called back to them.

"Enjoy your day at school, sweetie." His mom said.

"Don't be gay." His dad advised.

Goddamnit, Craig thought at he heard his parents start arguing. Time to leave.


	2. Chapter 2

"Hey Craig" Clyde waved to him from the back of the bus. Craig made his way down to sit next to his best friend.

"I got in trouble for those pictures you know." Craig informed his friend. "My dad saw me looking at them."

"That's not my fault." Clyde shrugged.

Craig furrowed his eyebrows.

"Hey, look at Bebe!" Clyde said excitedly.

Bebe just got on the bus, turning heads at her low cut tank top.

"Why's she wearing that in December?" Craig wondered aloud.

"I don't know, but I don't mind!" Clyde said, standing up to get a better view.

"I thought she was done showing off her body."

"Shut up Craig, you're gay so you can't imagine how awesome this is." Clyde whispered.

Craig flipped him off.

"Speaking of which, who do you have a crush on this week? Kenny? Jason?" Clyde teased, turning his attention away from Bebe for a second.

"None of your business." Craig said, flipping him off again.

"Ooh, is it me?" Clyde batted his eyes.

"I'm already over you." Craig said, peering over Clyde's shoulder to get a good view out the window.

"What."

"Never mind. That's Thomas' house, right? No wait, I think it's that one." Craig said.

"Oh, dude... how long have you liked him now? Four years?"

"Five." Craig replied without looking at Clyde.

"Just ask him out." Clyde said bluntly.

"No."

"Why not?" Clyde let out an exasperated sigh.

Craig didn't reply, now turning his attention to the front of the bus as it stopped outside Tweek's house. The blonde stepped into the vehicle and met Craig's gaze.

"That's why not." Craig finally answered.

Clyde turned his head to see Tweek.

"Oh, dude…" Clyde gave Craig a look of sympathy. "Rest in peace."

Tweek walked all the way to the back of the bus and sat in the seat next to Clyde and Craig.

"Hey guys." Tweek twitched.

"Hey Tweek, what's up?" Craig asked.

"Gah! I never know how to answer that question! Nothing goes on in my life." He said, eyes nervously darting to his left.

"Dude, you should stop drinking coffee. I don't know what your parents put in that stuff but it isn't good for you." Clyde said, noting Tweek's nervousness.

Craig's eyes were now fixed on Tweek's lips and he caught himself zoning out.

"Nng, give up coffee? No way man! That's way too much pressure."

"Tweek, honestly-" Clyde started.

"Hey, do either of you have plans for Christmas?" Craig interrupted.

They stared at him for a second.

"Well, yeah..." Clyde said. "With my family you know, like always."

"I mean after the presents." Craig clarified.

"Not really." Tweek said.

"Alright everyone, off the bus!" The driver called, coming to a stop in front of the school.

"We can talk about this later." Craig said as the three made their way back to the front of the bus.

Token was waiting for them by the front doors. "Where are we meeting at lunch?" He asked the group.

"Cafeteria, usual table." Said Craig.

"Alright, see you all there."


	3. Chapter 3

Craig nervously tapped his pencil on his desk, eyeing the clock at the front of the classroom. It was almost lunch and Thomas hadn't texted him back. Not that Craig was expecting him to just yet; Thomas actually paid attention in class.

Craig automatically checked his phone again. His heart fluttered for a moment when he realized a text had come through, only to settle down again in disappointment when he realized it was his mom texting about Tricia's forgotten lunch money.

Irritated, he tapped his pencil on the desk again to the tune of Funkytown.

"Well I talk about it, talk about it, talk about it, talk about it." He mumbled to himself.

"Talk about, talk about, talk about movin'. Gotta move on, gotta-"

"Craig Tucker, pay attention!" His teacher yelled at him.

"Goddamnit." Craig said under his breath.

"Fine, Craig. If you don't want to learn you can go to the counsellor's office to talk." She said putting her hands on her hips.

Craig glared at her, but stood up to leave. He knew she wasn't really giving him an option here. Unfortunately that meant he'd be spending his lunch hour with Mr. Mackey. Was that guy ever going to quit?

Craig knocked on the counsellor's door, hearing movement inside. He leaned closer to hear Mr. Mackey.

"Oh, sorry Principal Victoria, I've got to get this. It's probably Craig, m'kay. He hasn't been in trouble all day so I've been expecting him again sooner or later."

Craig frowned.

"That's fine Mr. Mackey, enjoy your lunch!" Principal Victoria said.

Craig moved aside as she opened the door.

"I'll see you later to talk about that thing we were talking about, m'kay?" Mr. Mackey moved into Craig's view.

"Sounds good!" She tittered, and walked down the hall towards the cafeteria.

"M'kay. Well Craig, would you like to have a seat in my office?" Mr. Mackey turned his attention towards him finally.

"No I would not." Craig stated.

"Alright, well come on in, m'kay." He lead Craig into the room.

"So why are you here this time, young man? Have you been jacking it in class again?"

"No, you're thinking of Kenny." Craig said.

"Oh, that's right." Mr. Mackey scratched his head.

"Mr. Mackey, can I ask you something?" Craig said, taking a leap of faith.

"Well of course, Craig. What's on your mind, m'kay?"

Craig took a deep breath.

"Okay. Say someone likes two, um, people, but they can't decide who to ask out because both of these people are cute. What should they do?" Craig asked.

Mr. Mackey stayed silent for a second before answering.

"Oh, I see. You're talking about your friend Clyde and his little girlfriends, Bebe and Red."

"Clyde likes Red?" Craig frowned.

"Well, you can tell him that there's more to girls than their looks, m'kay. You also have to consider how much they talk about their feelings, and how much of your money they're likely to spend in the future, and whether they'll complain if you want to get cozy in bed after a long day at work or not, m'kay?" Mr. Mackey looked at him expectantly.

"Oh, um. Thanks. I'll tell him that." Craig said. "Can I go now?"

"Yes you may, Craig." He said.

Craig got up and left quickly. He still had time to meet his friends in the cafeteria.


	4. Chapter 4

"D-d-dude. Where h-have you been?" Jimmy asked him as Craig sat down at their usual table.

"I got in trouble again." He said.

"What did you do this time?" Token asked, rolling his eyes.

"Literally nothing. I think my teacher just hates Funkytown." He said, taking a bite of his lunch.

"What?" Token asked.

"Nevermind, it doesn't matter."

"So what did you want to talk to all of us about?" Tweek asked.

Craig tried to avoid his gaze as he replied.

"Well, I was thinking on Christmas Day the five of us could go to that Christmas village with the carousel. I know it's kind of gay, but they have good apple cider and the light displays are always nice." Craig suggested.

He could see the other boys thinking it over while they picked at their food.

"Well, I know that I am d-down like a clown, Charlie B-Brown." Jimmy smiled.

"Could I bring Nichole?" Token asked.

"If Token's bringing Nichole, can I bring Bebe?" Clyde asked eagerly.

"She's not going to say yes." Craig replied.

"Fine, I'll ask someone else." Clyde said.

"Who, Red?" Craig snickered.

Clyde looked over at the girls' table, examining Red.

"No... her boobs aren't quite big enough." Clyde said seriously.

"Sh-shut your wh-wh-whore mouth, Clyde." Jimmy elbowed him. "S-save enough girls for the r-rest of us."

"Okay," Craig interrupted, "if you want to bring someone you can. But only one person each."

"Oh Jesus, I don't have someone to bring! Tweek panicked.

"Hey, you don't have to bring someone." Token assured him. "There's no way Clyde can get anyone to go with him-"

"Hey!"

"And I bet Craig doesn't have anyone in mind either." He finished.

"Actually, I was going to ask if Thomas wanted to come." Craig interjected.

"Your dad?" Tweek asked in confusion.

"I th-think he's t-talking about that blonde kid from the other s-s-school." Jimmy explained.

"Gah! What blonde kid?" Tweek asked.

"The one he totally has a boner for." Clyde smirked.

They all looked over at Craig when he didn't come up with a retort. He was staring down at his phone.

"Uh, Craig?" Token poked his shoulder.

"Sorry, what? I was reading a text." He said.

"Clyde just t-totally ripped on you, d-d-dude." Jimmy said.

"Oh, uh. Clyde, you're gay." Craig responded.

"Noooo no no no, _you're_ gay." Clyde said, poking Craig in the chest from across the table.

Craig flipped him off.

He went back to reading the text from Thomas.

"Sure, that sounds fun! Do you wanna meet at my place or your place? I've got some new video games we can play."

Craig typed out a response before deleting it without sending.

"Should we invite Jason too?" Clyde asked the group.

"No, I think he's got his own group of friends now. He's been hanging out with Kevin Stoley for a while." Token said.

Craig bit his lip in frustration. Why was texting so difficult? He took a bite of his lunch and tried to ignore his friends for a moment.

"My house is fine, you can bring your games over if you want. My parents are at work until 5 so we don't have to move the x-box upstairs or anything." He typed.

Craig smiled to himself before quickly finishing his lunch before the bell went off.


End file.
